"Taking someone else's spot"
I've seen the above several times in the past few days:
"I turned down my bid because I didn't like this group and didn't want to take someone else's spot." "If you hate the sorority that much, drop because you are taking someone else's spot." It kind of got me thinking: is this really true? It seems to be completely discounting the sorority's preference when saying this. If they liked someone else more, they would have put them first and offered them a bid before they offered it to the dissatisfied person. |
And for groups that aren't making quota, I think it's a moot issue because they still have 'spots' regardless of whether the PNM accepts the bid or not. I've always felt like it's more of an issue that a disappointed/negative/miserable PNM brings down the rest of the women in her pledge class as well as the chapter members, rather than an issue that she is 'taking up a spot', especially because this seems to come up more often with smaller chapters that have other 'spots' available. Just my $0.02.
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My guess is with QA's these days, if there are two ladies who are down to their only possible choice, XYZ: (A) ranked XYZ as a 3 at pref, but wasn't high enough on ABC or DEF's lists (her 1 and 2) (B) SIPed XYZ. ...and XYZ only has "1" spot, my guess is that they're both probably going to get it via QA. |
I think while it may not always be likely, it is always certainly possible.
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It' kinda like telling a child that won't eat her peas that there are starving children in Africa, ie. Be grateful for what you have.
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33girl, you need to clear out your message box!
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Another thing that I think needs its own thread:
"I cut them yesterday and for some reason they showed up on my schedule today." You aren't CUTTING anyone. You're simply ranking them last and saying that you'd PREFER all the other houses over them. |
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So what happens if a rushee goes to, say, 10 chapters, is supposed to rank her top 7 for the next day, but only lists 5?
If the system won't let her do that, is it really "mutual" selection? |
I think that's a bit of a different situation, DGTess. In that scenario, she's not listing chapters she'd be OK getting a bid with - she's ranking chapters that she visited that day in order of preference. The whole "taking someone else's spot" thing comes into play when chapters and PNMs are offering and accepting bids and they have to deal more directly with quota.
Frankly, if she's so repulsed by the thought of having a full schedule and getting the opportunity to learn more about chapters other than her favorite five that she'll deliberately leave two off... Well, that's the kind of attitude that, in some (not all, but some) cases, is indicative of the "I'm-better-than-them" attitude that isn't very good for any chapter. It's not as if accepting an invitation to the next round of parties means she'll be committed to joining the two chapters she didn't want to list, and it gives her more options if she ends up not being invited back to her top five. Recruitment is, in my opinion, about providing the maximum amount of opportunities to the maximum amount of people possible. If PNMs are not happy with the chapters they get invited back to, they can always drop out entirely, but it's really not fair to leave off chapters that you could be visiting before giving them a fair chance. |
Yes, it is. And I'll tell you why I think that.
The chapters issue the invitations. Just like you do to any function you have at your house. And based on their availability of schedule" and "level of interest," your guests accept or decline. So someone who isn't so interested still gets an invite because YOU want them there. However, they may not have room in their schedule for an event at that time so they decline. They still think you're on OK person so you still make their friend/co worker list but maybe not well enough to rearrange their schedule to accomodate an event at your house. No one with any manners would tell you that they just don't want to come to your house. And neither would the PNMs whom we consider to be young ladies. And if they do, then we know what happens then! That's always the way I've looked at it. I may not make the invite list because I'm friend number 215 and the church only holds 200 for a wedding. That's fine. I may decline the wedding invitation because frankly your events are never any fun or I can't afford a gift. But that's OK too. None of this means we can't be friends... |
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A closer analogy to what I'm seeing is everyone on my street having an open house on the same day, and inviting everyone in the neighborhood. There are some who don't want to come to my house, or to my neighbor's house, but want to visit everyone else. Why should that person have to visit the homes s/he doesn't want to? Seems to me that rush is the same way. Just because there are 8 time slots for parties and someone gets invitations to 8 parties, why must she go to all 8? Wouldn't "mutual" selection dictate that both sides get to "cut"? |
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Returning to a chapter in which the PNM is not interested in doesn't bind her to anything. Listing a chapter she doesn't want on her MRABA will bind her to that chapter if she is matched with it. I understand it doesn't feel very mututal to PNMs who are "forced" to return to chapters they may not want, but at the end of the day, no one is forcing them to join. College Panhellenics simply want PNMs to have every opportunity to see their realistic options. |
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