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duckylvr 08-21-2022 11:39 PM

AI Help and Journey
 
Hey everyone, I need some help or opinions and I wanted to share my story.

When I got into my preteen years/adulthood, I knew I wanted to join a sorority. I craved the support and knowledge from an organization of women that had gone back for generations. This is definitely due to the fact that my mom left my family when I was young, so while everyone around me had their moms to go to for support and advice, I didn't have anyone like that (I had a very small small family with just a single dad).

When I got to college, I sadly wasn't able to rush due to financial constraints and because I had been in an abusive relationship that sucked up my life. Looking back, I'm happy that I didn't rush because I know this abusive relationship would have affected me so much that I would have had to drop my sorority. In my last year of college, I became apart of a national sorority that was not apart of NPC. Obviously I won't say the name of the organization, but it wasn't exactly what I was looking for. The dues were very small and at the time I was so excited. I could find a sisterhood that would throw me in debt?? Great! Well, it was not so great. Nationals repeatedly mishandled our money as a chapter and had horrible communication with us. The group had no alumni societies and my last months were spent getting numerous emails of the different chapters closing, which would later include our own I believe, since recruitment went horribly the both semesters I was involved.

So here comes the questions. I had recently learned from a friend in an NPC sorority that I could pledge as an alumni. I was excited, but VERY cautious and tried not to get my hopes up, since I was apart of a non-NPC or NPHC sorority in college. I contacted the group she was apart of and have been in contact with someone who oversees this whole process! I told her all about my past sorority experience in college and she said that it was not a problem, since it was not an NPC or NPHC sorority.

Still, I'm so nervous about it all. I hate the idea that some people will see me as trading in one set of letters for the other even though that's not the case at all. I am not an alumni for the sorority I was in in college (I did not pay the alumni fee) and I have no connections with the group other than two friends (there is no alumni chapter in my entire region of the US).

I'm still searching for the rich sisterhood I've been looking for for forever, and I do believe that the NPC sorority that I've been in contact with will provide that, along with other philanthropy opportunities that I'd love to be apart of. But given my history, do you all think I should still go for it?

33girl 08-22-2022 12:52 AM

First off you are A PART of this sorority, not “apart” of it.

For most (NPC) groups, not paying an alumnae fee doesn’t mean you are not an alumna. If you graduated in good standing with the group and were not terminated or did not self-terminate, you are still an alumna. Not sure if your group operated the same way. I would caution against saying you’re “not a member” of this group any more unless you definitely know that to be true.

Did the NPC group you are looking at have a chapter at the school you attended?

Titchou 08-22-2022 07:17 AM

The rule only applies to NPC and NPHC groups. If your sorority (the one your were A PART OF) was not a member of either group, then you are fine. whether or not you paid their alum dues is not relevant. It is all predicated on the group's affiliation. You are good to go,.

SquirrelyDays 08-22-2022 07:37 AM

As an AI who was a member of a small local GLO service org that closed a few years after I graduated, I can say I don’t feel I have traded my letters. The benefits and characteristics of a local and an NPC are different. I was a little cautious when sharing things about my NPC org on social media at first after reconnecting on FB with members of my local service org because I didn’t want them to think I no longer cared for them, but honestly my DZX sisters are among the first to congratulate me on my AGD milestones and experiences. Those in my initiation class and the one immediately following and l do make time to see each other when traveling nearby. Our local introduced us but our hearts kept us friends. If you are most concerned about preserving your friendship with your sisters from the local you could talk with them about it first, but you are not breaking any rules by considering membership in an NPC org.

Of course for me that was 25+ years ago. If your local membership is more recent YMMV.

duckylvr 08-25-2022 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SquirrelyDays (Post 2491189)
As an AI who was a member of a small local GLO service org that closed a few years after I graduated, I can say I don’t feel I have traded my letters. The benefits and characteristics of a local and an NPC are different. I was a little cautious when sharing things about my NPC org on social media at first after reconnecting on FB with members of my local service org because I didn’t want them to think I no longer cared for them, but honestly my DZX sisters are among the first to congratulate me on my AGD milestones and experiences. Those in my initiation class and the one immediately following and l do make time to see each other when traveling nearby. Our local introduced us but our hearts kept us friends. If you are most concerned about preserving your friendship with your sisters from the local you could talk with them about it first, but you are not breaking any rules by considering membership in an NPC org.

Of course for me that was 25+ years ago. If your local membership is more recent YMMV.

I actually took some of your advice and talked with my few friends from my old org and they were ecstatic for me and told me to keep me updated on the process! Definitely lifted a weight off of my chest :)

duckylvr 08-25-2022 06:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2491184)
First off you are A PART of this sorority, not “apart” of it.

For most (NPC) groups, not paying an alumnae fee doesn’t mean you are not an alumna. If you graduated in good standing with the group and were not terminated or did not self-terminate, you are still an alumna. Not sure if your group operated the same way. I would caution against saying you’re “not a member” of this group any more unless you definitely know that to be true.

Did the NPC group you are looking at have a chapter at the school you attended?

In the org, you had to apply and pay an extra fee to join the alumni society, which I did not do when graduating. I could still find someone to email to see if I am technically still a part of the sorority though, just for clarification.

And the group did not, sadly, although I think they are trying to colonize where I went? That is moreso heresy though and not finalized.

duckylvr 08-25-2022 06:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Titchou (Post 2491188)
The rule only applies to NPC and NPHC groups. If your sorority (the one your were A PART OF) was not a member of either group, then you are fine. whether or not you paid their alum dues is not relevant. It is all predicated on the group's affiliation. You are good to go,.

Next time I won't type so fast haha!

But yes the group is not in either NPC or NPHC and was not affiliated with either councils at my school, and the representative from the organization I reached out to assured me that I was still okay to go forth with the process!

carnation 08-25-2022 06:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by duckylvr (Post 2491288)
That is moreso heresy though and not finalized.

hearsay

duckylvr 08-26-2022 12:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnation (Post 2491290)
hearsay


🤦*♀️

I guess everyone knows now that spelling is not my strength

carnation 08-26-2022 06:29 AM

Well, heresy means something really different!

duckylvr 04-10-2024 09:35 PM

I had some time to spare and decided to hop on here after a few years! Everything ended up working out fine for me with AI. I just scheduled my initiation date with my local alum chapter :) I'm so excited!

TLLK 04-11-2024 09:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by duckylvr (Post 2505212)
I had some time to spare and decided to hop on here after a few years! Everything ended up working out fine for me with AI. I just scheduled my initiation date with my local alum chapter :) I'm so excited!


Congratulations duckylvr! Perhaps after your initiation you can let us know which NPC organization you've joined. :)

duckylvr 04-11-2024 10:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TLLK (Post 2505218)
Congratulations duckylvr! Perhaps after your initiation you can let us know which NPC organization you've joined. :)

Thank you so much! I'd love to reveal the organization once I am initiated :) I'm so excited and honored to be joining a community of likeminded women

LouisaMay 04-17-2024 07:01 AM

Congratulations! I hope you have a wonderful experience.

honeychile 04-17-2024 08:03 AM

You've received great advice from some great people, and I can't add much to it.
I did need to post, however, as I too am a ducky lover!


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