[SophieCat]

I am rushing Fall 2008... or I plan on it at least. I have a bajillion worries and any consolation or help will be much appreciated. I think I just need a confidence boost, but be honest...

So... I am going to be a sophomore at my school this fall. I am very shy, and last year I made several "friendly acquaintances" but not even one real friend. I am sick of being so lonely and friendless so I thought maybe going through recruitment and hopefully joining a sorority will help me to make the sister-like friends I long for. I registered for the fall 2008 recruitment already but I am unsure if I will actually through with it. I am unsure how competitive my school's rush is but I know that the sororities have a seperate quota for the few non-freshman who rush. However, I am not a legacy to any sorority and it looks like I am not going to have any recs at all. (My parents and most of the adults I know did not go to colleges with greek life or were not a member of one. There is no alumnae association in or near my area. Also, my school's PH site says not to worry about them, only contact alumna you know.) Some of my aforementioned "friendly acquaintances" are in sororities but I am not entirely sure what impression they have of me. I have a terrible fear that I will be rejected by all of the orgs at my school. Even worse is the fear that I will join one only to find I don't really fit in. I afraid that I won't know what to say at the parties and will make myself look dumb. I am afraid that I will end up being the only non-Freshman going through rush. I am afraid that I will chicken out and instead hide in my room alone like I did all last year. I wouldn't feel half this worried if I wasn't rushing alone.
I'm not sure if anyone can help, but any ideas?