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I forgot who said it here, but a PNM should picture herself "during finals week, with messy hair, living in sweats, and in need of a shower." and I took that to heart. I don't blame 18 year olds in thinking "oh I'm hot stuff ABC is a low even when they invited me back over DEF who is the one others kill to get into." since I was there once. It takes maturity in knowing where you fit conversation/vibe wise, but with many going through fall recruitment and having that be their first campus exposer, it's sadly normal.
I do remember that during virtual recruitment, a lot of this was thrown out the window with there being zero tent talk between PNMs, so not only a lot of girls were going with their gut rather than appearance, but many "low" chapters were making quota.
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