I think it is normal for their to be tension between alumni and undergraduate members on occassion. I now that our alumni club from time to time has to play "bad guy" with the undergraduates. I think it is important though to have frequent interaction in a relaxed, social setting, apart from meetings, rituals, etc. Let the undergraduates get to know you as people, not just as the "alumni". I think this is typically the biggest problem in alumni-undergraduate relations; the alumni have a hard time relating to "today's" undergraduate members, and the undergraduates may not be used to having relationships with "grown-ups" who are not in position of authority over them (i.e. parents, teachers, etc..). I know for me, one of the most rewarding aspects of my involvement (as a chapter advisor and as president of our alum club) has been getting to know our undergraduate members, and for them feeling comfortable enough to seek my advice or come talk to me about problems that they might not be able to talk to someone else about!
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