What Not to Say to a Released PNM

[gatorgeneration]

Originally Posted by adpiucf

Good posts. What are some things TO SAY?

As a PNM that was cut from a big SEC recruitment just about a week ago, I can tell you there are very few things that can make us feel better. I told my mom a few minutes after I got that unwanted phone call from my Pi Chi, and a few hours later I had a delivery for some lovely flowers with a little note that said "Don't worry, there is something wonderful just around the corner. Love, Mom." It made me smile, but I was still rather upset for a few days. My friends, brother, boyfriend all said the things we don't want to hear:

"I never pictured you as a sorority girl anyway." "You'll make better friends somewhere else." "You can always join a club or a 'professional' fraternity." "I told you; you were probably cut because you're a sophomore." (this one obviously hurt the most)

But at least they were there for me, that's probably the best thing. Don't say anything, anything that has to do with Greek life. Go out to a nice dinner, indulge in retail therapy, or something that will get the PNM's mind off of recruitment. Give them a few days, maybe even a week, to be sad, and just be there for them.

If she's still determined to join Greek life (I still am!) then let her know she'll have a better chance at informal/formal recruitments if she meets sorority women, gets involved, and keeps her grades up, and gets those recs.