Greek Alums

[33girl]

Leslie Anne,

I read your post in the previous alum thread and I hope you're just having a cranky day.

I live far away from a lot of my chapter sisters too but I keep in touch with them all the time. It's called E-MAIL!! No, it's not the same as being there, but it does help. If you have the bonds time and distance won't sever them. I went to lunch with a chapter sister I haven't seen in 10 years and it was like I just talked to her yesterday.

As far as the alum association prob, just keep trying to get in touch with them, like e-mailing every other day or something. As a prez of an alumnae chapter I know sometimes real life intrudes on sorority life (how rude! ) and you can't always get back to people asap. In addition, it is sometimes hard to get past the regional differences between collegiate chapters - I'd be lying if I said it wasn't.

plus, I found this link a while back, it is for a KD online newsletter. http://members.nbci.com/kdonline/ You might be able to hook up with some sisters in your area that way.

At any rate, GOOD LUCK!

[Tom Earp]

To the 2 above posts, while my chapter had no Alum group in KC, another chapter started an allKC group and one of the Brothers contacted me. I was delighted and started getting my chapters Brothers to join. If nothing else to build a strong area Alum group. After 2 years, the originators wanted to go back on their own as they had higher priorities. Well, it worked out very well as my chapter has its own Alum group and is stronger than the area Alum group was! Thias may be a horn blowing time as We are all Brothers but it feels good to have grown out of the ahse's. If the "Alum Chapter" is so large, is there not maybe a smaller Alum chapter around? In Calif., there should be a lot of chapters, so I would check with them and ask about their Alum group/ I would also explain you situation and I am sure you will be more than welcome. After all, you can give them insight on what happened in your area!
While it may sound trite, but on a thread, e-bay was mentioned and badges on it.I started checking for my Badge and started bidding to keep them with a Member. In checking and e-m to bidders, i found out I was bidding against Brothers doing the same thing! I dropped to keep the price down and get them to the right place.
While said trite, I have met and been in contact with @ 10 new Brothers and are staying in touch to see what is going on at their local chapters!
So you see, we ahve the same common thread as have been initiated and all know the same things. There is a bond, and it should be there for each Organization. Try a few of these things and maybe it will go better and i rally hope you find some of your SOROity sisters that you can get together with. Keep informed!!!

------------------
Tom Earp LX Z#1
Pittsburg State U. (Kansas)

[Tom Earp]

Yo L A, you might try you Natioanl site to see if they have a list of Alums and address's. Contact your House and see if they have a list they can send to you through mail!
I got a list on excel from my International and it was so screwed up to work with some of my Alums set up anew program that is easier to work with except for me! I am PC challenged!!!!!

Contact some local houses and go meet them! A foot in the door is better than in the mouth! I know I have foot and mouth!

------------------
Tom Earp LX Z#1
Pittsburg State U. (Kansas)

[33girl]

Leslie Anne - believe me, we all have our days where we just go "@#*%!!" Just like with regular families, we have our days where with our Greek families we want to scream. E-mail me if you want, 'kay?

[Miami1839]

Leslie Anne,

I can relate in some ways. My chapter closed in 97 for various reasons from George Mason. We are welcome to come back to the school but basically my chapter got complacent and we went down the tubes. About that same time one of my brothers died in a car accident. The last time I saw my big brother was at the funeral. Its been 4 years now and I think since I've been an alum I feel more spirited about my Fraternity. After graduation I really didnt hang out much except for New Years 2 years ago at LuLus in DC and recently I did reconnect with group of my brothers and it was awesome. Its not exactly the same as it was in college, but we're still very close and recently shared many memories of great times. We still email and call each other even with our busy schedules. I dont think you could pay enough for that. I do feel bitter sometimes about what we lost but those are the times I really try hard and look at how thankful I was of the good times(not necessarily parties). Especially how great we are nationally and the legacy we've had. I will never regret my choice for going Beta and I am very proud of who I am a part of. I could never have gone anyone else.

Kevin
Beta Theta Pi Alum
George Mason
Epsilon Mu

[This message has been edited by Miami1839 (edited April 29, 2001).]

[Miami1839]

Siobhan,

Congratulations

Kevin

[Tom Earp]

Damn, it is amazing to find out how each of of feel about our own Greek Organization!
It really means a whole lot to each of us know matter when we were there and how long we have been gone!
Each of us went through our own ritual, and is it not very hard to forget!
This is what HOLDS EACH of us to our FRATWRNITY/SORORITY, and the Greek World!
We are each on this web site to carry on our tradiditions and love!

------------------
Tom Earp LX Z#1
Pittsburg State U. (Kansas)

[LexiKD]

Hi Leslie Anne!
I'm a KD alumna attempting to start an Alumnae Association here in NC. I read your posts and feel sorry for the neglect, but I have just been to an AA conference and many associations have many issues, too many members is the largest area for concern. Maybe you could contact your APP, she will be able to help. If the AA is too big they could brake off into 2 groups, like a day or night group and maybe you could head that up!
I hope you can work it out, if you cannot find your APP's name and number I could look it up for you!
AOT

------------------
Lexi

[Tom Earp]

The main thing with Greek Organizations, is you can find a BRO/Sis to talk with. You may have been a big Brother or had a big Brother (SIS) but you became very close, almost the same as real Family! I know I am closer to some of My Fraternity Brothers than I am my own Flesh Brother. You have to stay involved and hoppifully they want the same as you had. You must teach them as they have to learn. That is why Greeks are stronger when we Graduate tha independents. They do not know how to interact!

------------------
Tom Earp LX Z#1
Pittsburg State U. (Kansas)

[Tom Earp]

Yo LES ANN, did you have any luck! Have not heard back from YA!

------------------
Tom Earp LX Z#1
Pittsburg State U. (Kansas)

[Tom Earp]

Yo Les Anne, have not heard back from you to see if you had any lick!
It is never easy but you will find out that the 20 % will be the ones to do the work!
Let us know as we are a part of you on this site!

------------------
Tom Earp LX Z#1
Pittsburg State U. (Kansas)

[LexiKD]

I hate the fact that you want to give up.
My soon to be AA has only 12 members as of today and we are all very different. I'm the youngest one, everyone else has children or is married...they have a way different lifestyle, but we all made a HUGE effort to get along. We have informal dinners as a brake the ice type of event and it works. So well in fact that I have plans with 2 girls to do dinner and a movie Friday.

KD is so awesome that we all feel like it's time to give back and an Alumnae Association is the perfect venue. It's not only about making friends, it's about Shamrock, chapter help, community service, and so much more. It's kinda like laid back chapter life in some ways. One of my sisters, from my chapter, just moved to NYC had no place to stay and no friends. She hooked up with the alum association and she loves it. They are a huge group as well, but she has benefited a lot from the association and without KD it would have taken her a long time to get settled.

I hope you give it another try.

I think the dinner you attended would be difficult to bond with other KDs, it was their chapter's party...I would have felt strange too.

AOT

------------------
Lexi

[dzrose93]

Leslie Anne,

I'm sorry that you feel the way you do about your sorority. When I first got out of school, I was so burned out from doing DZ stuff that I didn't get involved in an alumnae association right away. It took almost 3 years before I was ready to jump back in. And that was a big jump! Going to that first meeting and not knowing a soul was petrifying. But I stuck with it.

Now, a year and half later, I'm a member of 2 alumnae chapters, am on the advisory board for a local DZ collegiate chapter, am the webmaster for 1 alum chapter, and am the Membership Chairman for the state of GA. It's like having 2 full-time jobs. One that gives me a paycheck every two weeks and one that gives me happiness all the time!

Luckily for me, the alum chapters that I joined are small. One has about 16 members and the other about 30. If we combined the 6 DZ alum chapters in the Atlanta area, we'd probably have a too-large group, much like the one you described. Perhaps you could suggest breaking up into a few different chapters? For example, our chapters are divided by location. We have the Northside chapter for north Atlanta suburb sisters, the Southern Crescent chapter for those down South of the airport, the Atlanta chapter for metro women, etc., etc., etc.

At any rate, I completely understand you feeling out of place with everyone already knowing each other. The best way to get around that is to keep going to the meetings so that the girls will start to recognize you. Also, take baby steps by introducing yourself to just one or two girls each time you go.

Pick someone who looks like they're in the same age range to start out with because you'll probably have more in common with those people. Get their e-mail addresses and send them a note after the meeting, telling them how much you enjoyed getting to know them and asking them to let you know next time they get together. That's how I met a lot of my sisters. It's tough at first, but I really think you'd be happier once you got involved.

Also, I can't stress this part enough, being in an alumnae chapter is completely different from being in a collegiate one. I won't say that one is necessarily more fun than the other, because they both have their good points. BUT there is a significant difference in the lifestyle you lead in the "real world" than in the collegiate world. And alumnae chapters reflect that in the types of gatherings they have and in the types of women involved. Good luck!

[LexiKD]

Hey DZ rose, I love Atlanta and know what you mean! KD has about 4 associations and they are all full.
I think it is a good idea to ask to split too, many times we have different areas or day and night groups too!
By the way, one of my best friends in the world is a DZ and is awesome, I got the chance to meet one of your national officers during Something of Value and she was the best!

[33girl]

Hey Leslie Anne -

I agree with what everyone else has said, don't give up! You do need to "decompress" after leaving school, especially if you were particularly active in your chapter or your chapter did a lot of activities. I wouldn't rule out the alum associations yet though! Plus, how long have you been in Cali? I'm from PA and one of my boyfriend's friends moved there and for a while it was really hard for him because everything is SO different.

I think the sister who took you to her chapter function meant well but at the same time I don't know what she was thinking - I would feel uncomfortable too if I went to a chapter anniversary where I didn't know a soul and everyone else was hugging and reminiscing. Don't let that turn you off.

Alum membership is a LOT different than collegiate membership - good and bad. The bad is that sometimes people blow things off and slack. But the good is you know if people are participating, they really want to be there, not just because it's a mandatory activity. The change can be a bit jarring but you just have to relax and go with the flow. I would definitely bring up splitting the associations, they should be big enough to operate but not so big they are unwelcoming.

Try going to the meeting in June and see how it goes. You never know who will show up - one of my sisters from another school turned out to be the girl who'd been sitting next to me at work for 3 months! You never know - you could click with someone even more than you did in your collegiate years. GOOD LUCK!

[This message has been edited by 33girl (edited May 10, 2001).]