Rush - What to NOT do or say

[MSKKG]

Remember that you are a guest in the sorority's home and act accordingly. On the flip side, the sorority members must remember that they are hostesses and act accordingly.

[honeychile]

Originally posted by MSKKG
Remember that you are a guest in the sorority's home and act accordingly. On the flip side, the sorority members must remember that they are hostesses and act accordingly.

Wonderful and sound advice to all concerned, MSKKG!

I once had a pnm say to me (all identities changed), "My name is Amy, I'm a freshman, I'm a pre-med major, I'm from Canada, and I'm not a legacy. What else do you want to talk about?" With a little panache, she might have pulled it off, but her attitude while saying it left a lot to be desired.

honeychile

[CutiePie2000]

Originally posted by MTSUGURL
Instead of asking for tips for recruitment and hearing, "keep an open mind" and "be yourself":

Everyone should read:My Advice to Sorority Rushees by southern_theta

[LeslieAGD]

If you have a friend in a particular chapter, DON'T assume you're automatically going to be in. Make an effort to meet people and make a connection.

DON'T dress provacatively and/or cake on your make up. People will make assuptions that you're trashy/superficial.

DON'T be that annoying person with a cell phone at a rush party!!!

[DDlegacy]

Cell phones are the worst!!!

I had a girl who came in late on the first day (the Rho Chi's decided to let her in to the party) and was sat down with me and the PNM I was talking to, and then she asked if she could use the phone, and was on the phone for the remainder of my time. I didn't get to know anything about her, other than she wasn't prompt or polite.
Needless to say, I made sure she wasn't invited back.
The parties aren't that long, so use your phone in between!!!
You don't see the sorority ladies on their phones--ours are usually locked away for the entire day.

[KSUViolet06]

During recruitment, DON'T ASK the following questions:

**How do you decide who gets a bid?"

**"Am I going to get a bid?"

**"Is my friend _______ going to get a bid?"

**"Why wasn't my friend ______ invited back this round?"

**"How close am I to getting a bid?"

REASON:

The member selection process of every Panhellenic sorority is private, meaning it cannot be discussed with PNM's during recruitment. As much as you might want to know one of the above, sorority members can't discuss that info with you. So it's best not to ask.

[AChiOhSnap]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

During recruitment, DON'T ASK the following questions:

**How do you decide who gets a bid?"

REASON: The member selection process of every Panhellenic sorority is private, meaning it cannot be discussed with PNM's during recruitment. As much as you might want to know one of the above, sorority members can't discuss that info with you. So it's best not to ask.

Very true.

While sorority members are generally coached to answer these types of questions, it really only puts us in a bad position to have to give you some canned answer...

"How do you decide who gets a bid?"
"Well, we really can't tell you our process, since membership selection is private, but we look for women who are the best fit for our sorority."

Obviously, those answers aren't really what the PNMs are looking for, but that's all we can say. As best as we're coached, these questions just are awkward any way you look at it.

Other questions to avoid (these are all from personal recruitment experience, and all have which been awkward for me to answer because of the "gray area" of MS involved in the response)

- "What made you decide to invite me back tonight over all the other PNMs?"
- "So are you voting on us tonight?"
- "Will xxxxx (some event that happened during recruitment) hurt my chances at joining your sorority?"
- "I'm a legacy, does that mean I have a better chance at getting in?"

Anything that even remotely involves "your chances" at joining the sorority in question should be really off limits. We're not trying to be rude or evasive in our non-answers, we just really don't want to be the cause of a huge recruitment infraction for our sorority!

[Axid angel]

Originally Posted by DDlegacy

Cell phones are the worst!!!

I had a girl who came in late on the first day (the Rho Chi's decided to let her in to the party) and was sat down with me and the PNM I was talking to, and then she asked if she could use the phone, and was on the phone for the remainder of my time. I didn't get to know anything about her, other than she wasn't prompt or polite.
Needless to say, I made sure she wasn't invited back.
The parties aren't that long, so use your phone in between!!!
You don't see the sorority ladies on their phones--ours are usually locked away for the entire day.

i was alway told no cell phones no matter what! the pnms weren't even allowed to bring their purses in. that gir was really rude though, your chapter did right not to invite her back. was she given a bid by any other chapter? you don't have to say which one.

[Axid angel]

i just thought of another don't. don't wear the same set of clothes two days in a row. not just for appearences, but because recruitment is usually at the tail end of summer and people tend to sweat. you would think this is obvious information, but i have a friend who does this all the time and it is really gross!

[MaggieXi]

My biggest petpeeve - during recruitment and later in life in the work place --- DON'T WEAR TOO MUCH PURFUME! A lot of people, like myself, have allergies and can be sensitive to perfumes. A little is fine, but if you wear too much -- or don't know if you are wearing too much you run the risk of offending people's olfactory sense and may send some of us running for the tissues.

[LatinaAlumna]

I'm a member of a national Latina sorority, and here are some things that I would recommend that aspirants NOT do at informationals or other recruitment activities:

1. Don't talk about the men in the campus Latino fraternity--don't talk about how you always hang with them, how hot they are, how much you hate them, etc. Refrain from asking if that fraternity is the "brother" organization to the sorority you are interested in. For one thing, you could find out that information ahead of time, and second, why does it even matter?

2. Don't talk about how much you love the sorority's jackets, t-shirts, etc. It makes it look like you are interested just so you can wear letters.

3. Likewise, don't ask about the parties, unless you are asking a question about maintaining balance between academic, service, and social activities.

4. Don't lie. Ever. You will be found out. Further, don't assume that the NPC and NALFO orgs. don't talk to each other. If you first go through NPC rush, do something shady, then try to join a Latina or other non-NPC sorority, it will come out (or vice-versa). When I was chapter president, I had many conversations with the NPC presidents on particular women, and we usually caught them in some sort of lie.

5. Never put down the other Latina sororities (or any sororities) on campus. It is not going to win points at all.

6. If you are invited to participate in the prospective membership process, DO NOT go to the local greek shop and pre-order sorority gear, no matter how "close" you feel that you are to becoming a member. You WILL get caught!

7. Finally, if you don't get invited to pursue membership, or if you do but you drop out, don't be tacky and start an entirely new sorority just so you can call yourself a "founder." At least show some discretion and lay low for awhile if you're going to try to pursue another sorority...but do know that the next sorority WILL ask the first sorority about you...

Things to DO:

1. Do study...HARD! Keep up your time management skills!

2. Definitely talk about your past community service and leadership experiences, as well as other interests at information sessions. We want to get to know you as much as you want to get to know us!

3. If the chapter puts on campus-wide events or activities, you should participate.

4. Think very hard about whether this is the right time for you to take on the responsibility of being in a sorority. Are your grades where you want them to be? Are you actively working towards graduate school, an internship, etc.? Do you have time to go to meetings, hold a leadership role (because most LGLO chapters are small, and EVERY PERSON has to hold an office, sometimes two), participate in service activities, hold down a job (or two), etc.? Will your family understand that you are making a commitment to the organization that will likely take you away from time with them? (This is a HUGE issue in LGLOs).

5. Relax, and be yourself.

[Mochababy_989]

HI, Im new and this all has helped me alot. I a "sister" of a member of Zeta Phi Beta and she told me a couple of things to do and not to do.

1. If you want to be a member, the whole campus does not need to know. Tell a member of the org. and leave it alone.
2. DO NOT join a sweetheart group and expect to join the sorority.(Sweetheart group is like a fan club of the Frats)
3. Do your reasearch. Be able to tell the org. about themsleves, and be able to tell them why you want to join.

Thats all I know that seems relevant.

O yea, also, Im not sure if this applies to other people, but I was told just because you know a member doesnt mean the process will be any easier for you.

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by Mochababy_989

HI, Im new and this all has helped me alot. I a "sister" of a member of Zeta Phi Beta and she told me a couple of things to do and not to do.

1. If you want to be a member, the whole campus does not need to know. Tell a member of the org. and leave it alone.
2. DO NOT join a sweetheart group and expect to join the sorority.(Sweetheart group is like a fan club of the Frats)
3. Do your reasearch. Be able to tell the org. about themsleves, and be able to tell them why you want to join.

Thats all I know that seems relevant.

O yea, also, Im not sure if this applies to other people, but I was told just because you know a member doesnt mean the process will be any easier for you.

Greekchat is ONLY a place to discuss relevant events in Greek Lettered Organizations.

Memberships in the NPHC remain undiscussed.

What you need to know can be done by "Private Messaging" or PMing someone with the organization of your interest.

And information and rules about the Threads are posted prominently.

[h.spectacular]

I don't know if anyone mentioned this, but is there certain clothing choices that we should wear when visiting houses?

this is helping me so so much! Thanks!

[lionlove]

The only thing that ever annoyed me at a rush party was boredom. It never happened during conversation but during skit one year we were performing and we saw one girl with a bored look. Trust me, we notice these things.