Good in bed?

[James]

I was discussing with a group of friends the age ole question of how you know if you are good in bed. After all no one complains to your face so most of the feedback is good.

So we pondered it over a few beers and shots. It was a mixed group . . and this is what we decided:

For the guy, the obvious is true, he demonstrates skills when he is able to maintaina high state of arousal for a girl and give her orgasms. The better he is able to do that, especially in the face of someone that isn't basically a short fuse, the better skills he has.

Also the quicker and more intensely he can arouse the girl when she isn't already in the mood is a factor.

What we decided for the girl is counter intuitive. She demonstrates skills when she is able to maintain a high level of arousal in the boy but is able to delay and prolong his climax . . the longer she can keep him intensely aroused and engaged without climaxing is a tribute to her skills.

What I was curious about, is how many of you ladies thought of it this way prior to this post?

Or what you thought being "good in bed" meant?

[valkyrie]

You'll never really know if you're good in bed. Women fake orgasms all the time (I have no idea why unless it's really terrible and she wants it to just end already, but that's a discussion for another day).

[sugar and spice]

Originally posted by valkyrie
You'll never really know if you're good in bed. Women fake orgasms all the time (I have no idea why unless it's really terrible and she wants it to just end already, but that's a discussion for another day).

Agreed.

The thing about being good in bed is that you will NEVER know. You can only know when you're bad, because somebody might come straight out and say something, but if somebody ever tells you how good you are, they could easily be lying, or faking it. This is especially true with men, because women are a lot harder to read than men are.

[OtterXO]

I agree...although I don't think a woman is doing herself or her man by faking it. I mean if you usually enjoy sex, don't fake it to make him feel better...if he knows what he's doing he can tell it's fake!!!!!! AND...if you always fake it that is just ridiciulous...no fun for you and if he knew he would feel pretty bad because (most) guys want the woman they're with to enjoy sex!

I agree with the good in bed analysis, James! I would add that for women I think varying what you do is very important to prolong but keep things at a high level....if you know what i mean.

[DGqueen17]

My ex didn't know I was faking it. I just wanted it to be over. God he was horrible in bed thank god he dumped me.

[jharb]

Originally posted by DGqueen17
My ex didn't know I was faking it. I just wanted it to be over. God he was horrible in bed thank god he dumped me.

why wouldn't you just dump him if he was that bad?

[DGqueen17]

Originally posted by jharb
why wouldn't you just dump him if he was that bad?

Because I was young and stupid and didn't know it was bad sex yet.

[cashmoney]

Originally posted by DGqueen17
Because I was young and stupid and didn't know it was bad sex yet.

Heh.

[LeslieAGD]

There is no universal good-in-bed. What is good with one partner can be lackluster with another.

[XOMichelle]

I really think it depends on what you like, and that mysterious elusive element of chemistry. Everyone is different, so I feel I have to go through a period of learning with each new person so I can do what they like the most.

[OtterXO]

Originally posted by LeslieAGD
There is no universal good-in-bed. What is good with one partner can be lackluster with another.

I disagree, I am universally fantastic in bed...haha

[cashmoney]

Originally posted by OtterXO
I disagree, I am universally fantastic in bed...haha

Funny, I was thinking the same thing about myself.

[OtterXO]

Originally posted by cashmoney
Funny, I was thinking the same thing about myself.

haha...i would have predicted that

[cashmoney]

Originally posted by OtterXO
haha...i would have predicted that

Random memory, I was in highschool and was dating this one chick. First girl I was ever in love with, or so I thought. I was at a party one night and this other chick was there. She was hot. Girlfriend was not there. Turns out the girl liked me. So what does she do? She says to me, "Look at what I can do" Then she put a whole coke can in her mouth, lips wrapped all around it. After that, she takes it out and then says "Now watch this" thats when she put her fist in her mouth. After that she asked me if I wanted to make out. I told her no because I loved my girlfriend.......

I was such a dumbass.

[OtterXO]

Originally posted by cashmoney
Random memory, I was in highschool and was dating this one chick. First girl I was ever in love with, or so I thought. I was at a party one night and this other chick was there. She was hot. Girlfriend was not there. Turns out the girl liked me. So what does she do? She says to me, "Look at what I can do" Then she put a whole coke can in her mouth, lips wrapped all around it. After that, she takes it out and then says "Now watch this" thats when she put her fist in her mouth. After that she asked me if I wanted to make out. I told her no because I loved my girlfriend.......

I was such a dumbass.

Similar story...in college I was dating serious boyfriend, this hot boy on my floor had massive crush on me and always asked me to hang out. I thought hot boy was hot (obviously) but never wanted to hang out because of stupid boyfriend. After boyfriend and I break up, hot boy calls me and asks me out and I never called him back....I still to this day cannot figure out why I didn't call him back....he was so hot and I was a dumbass.